Pippa Middleton became engaged to Terribly Rich™ James Matthews over the summer. James doesn’t have a title and he has at least one dodgy family relation (a reality show star, how gauche), but the engagement has been seen in as a “smart match” in nearly every social circle. James is rich and well-liked, and Pippa is boring and the sister-in-law to Prince William. Even the British papers think Pippa made a smart match and that her life will be so much easier than Kate’s. The British papers have also been trying to make Pippa’s wedding plans sound exciting, and no one’s really buying it. Like, is it scandalous that Kate might be pregnant by the time Pippa’s wedding rolls around? Of course not. Is it controversial that Pippa might ask her niece and nephew to be involved with such a peasanty wedding? No. So, Pippa’s people finally got around to confirming some of the details of her wedding:

Pippa Middleton is to marry in her local village church — in stark contrast to sister Kate’s Westminster Abbey extravaganza. The younger sibling — whose pert bottom was a huge hit at the Duchess of Cambridge’s royal wedding — has chosen pretty St Mark’s Englefield for her marriage to tycoon James Matthews in May next year. And the party will be held at her parents’ £6million home in nearby Bucklebury, Berks. Her 17-month-old niece Princess Charlotte and nephew Prince George, three, are expected to be a flower girl and page boy.

A friend said: “There’s been a lot of speculation that Pippa would get married at her fiancé’s hunting lodge in Scotland or have a ­massive bash in London. But she’s a traditional girl and just wanted to get married at home. Her mum has been very involved in all the wedding planning and she wants to show off their house to all their friends. Plus, how can you compete with Kate who got married at Westminster Abbey and Buckingham Palace? This way, Pippa can keep it private and very personal.”

Pippa, 33, is planning for around 150 guests at the church with more invited to the reception in a ­marquee at Bucklebury Manor. Along with William and Kate, Prince Harry is also expected to be invited. Pippa’s brother James Middleton and girlfriend Donna Air will be there along with uncle Gary Goldsmith, who was caught offering cocaine to undercover reporters. The groom’s brother Spencer, of I’m A Celeb and Made in Chelsea, is understood to be best man.

Carole, 61, and Pippa were seen shopping for wedding invitations at posh Mount Street Printers in Mayfair, central London, this week. And the pair have been seen shopping for dresses at top-end stores including Suzanne Neville. Pippa is said to favour a lace design with full skirt — completely different from the slinky bridesmaid dress that propelled her to fame at the Royal Wedding in 2011.

Pals say she wants something more “demure” for her own big day. One said: “Pippa found all the attention on her bottom really embarrassing. She works out a lot and loves sport, but couldn’t understand all the fuss. With her dress, she wants something classic and demure and very different from her sister’s. She realises comparisons will be made, but is very excited about her own big day.”

A May wedding in the English country, with a reception to follow at the Middletons’ manor – which William partially paid for following his wedding to Kate. Considering James Matthews’ wealth, I was expecting something bigger and splashier, honestly. At the very least, I was expecting a London wedding with lots of posh attendees. But now that I’m thinking about it, Pippa probably does want to avoid side-by-side comparisons with Kate. I do think a big part of this is that Carole wants to show off Middleton Manor too. I wonder if Prince Harry will turn up? I wonder how many of Pippa’s exes will be invited? And I also wonder how the dress is going to turn out. Pippa has a small, slender, athletic figure and a dress with a “lace design with full skirt” sounds like the design could overwhelm her.

Also: “royal experts” are analyzing why Kate probably won’t be Pippa’s maid/matron of honor. My guess is that it’s because Kate will probably be knocked up by the wedding. But there’s also a theory that Pippa will want it to be HER day, and blah blah, passive aggressive sister drama.

Via www.celebitchy.com

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