It’s always amazing to me how different/younger/better Gwyneth Paltrow looks when she does a side part and doesn’t flat-iron her hair. Why doesn’t she pay attention to how magazine stylists do her hair and try that for her red carpet appearances? It’s a mystery. Anyway, Gwyneth covers the February issue of InStyle Magazine, seemingly just to promote Goop and all of her Goop-related stuff, like a new book about her Juice Beauty collaboration. It’s a whole little Goop-industry now and Gwyneth gets magazine covers to talk about her business rather than her acting career and she’s super-smug about all of it. You can see InStyle’s feature here, and here are some quotes from the interview:

On her decision to start Goop and become an entrepreneur: “I’ll think, ‘Oh my god, I used to have a life of a spoiled movie star… What the f—? Why did I do this to myself?”

On why she wanted to release her new Clean Beauty book: “I mean, it’s shocking to me that the government doesn’t regulate this stuff… How many of my friend have had fertility issues? How many of my daughter’s friends have had precocious puberty? Well, maybe that’s because we are putting endocrine-disrupting hormones in everything.”

On being a pioneer of esoteric health treatments: “I’ve learned how the cycle works… It used to be that I would talk about something or write about it, and people would be like, ‘What the f— is she talking about? She’s a witch!’ And then later on it would sort of catch on. So now I just recognize it: OK, I’m going to talk about this, and people will think it’s weird, and that’s how it goes.”

On not caring what people think of her as she ages: “When I turned 40, I felt like I got this free software upgrade that I wasn’t expecting. It just happened. Suddenly I was like, ‘Oh, this is fantastic: I don’t care! I like myself, and I’m just going to live my life. I’m going to stop worrying and tearing myself down.’”

On the challenge of sometimes pushing the needle on wellness issues: “I’m like, this is my role. I’m here to do this. A friend told me if you’re a trailblazer, you’re the first one through, and you get the cuts because you’re hacking the path.”

On Chris Martin: “He’s at my house every single day. We have our own lives but we still have our family life. And to this day, Chris would take a bullet for me. Even though I’m not his wife. I honestly think Chris and I have contributed something positive to the culture of divorce.”

How Brad Falchuk feels about her arrangement with Chris: “He has his own version of it, his own family where it’s not a couple but it’s a family.”

On acting: “I don’t think I like it anymore,” the Oscar winner confides, adding that she’s not even sure what Marvel movies she’s contracted to appear in as her Pepper Potts character. “I think it’s Avengers or Captain America, one of those,” she quips.

I consistently love that Gwyneth Paltrow has the speech patterns of a Jane Austen villain: “A friend told me if you’re a trailblazer, you’re the first one through, and you get the cuts because you’re hacking the path.” You see, people, Gwyneth isn’t calling herself a trailblazer, she’s merely repeating an amusing anecdote from a friend, a friend who deigned to call Gwyneth a trailblazer. As for the rest of it… I’m consistently reminded of the fact that Gwyneth has spent her entire adult life surrounding herself with fake gurus and PhDs in Medical Feelings. She’s not a trailblazer, she’s a follower – a follower of whatever touchy-feely faux-esoteric bulls—t is in vogue at the time.

As for what she says about Chris… God, so smug. He would take a bullet for her? Sure, Goop. Whatever you say. And I still want to know if Brad Falchuk has even gotten around to divorcing his wife. It’s fascinating that Gwyneth hasn’t gotten any sh-t for homewrecking Brad’s marriage, not to mention her own.


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